I began Tuesday morning, Election Day, by going to the polls to vote, along with Drama Daughter (21) who was voting in her first presidential election. We went early because Drama Daughter had to be at school by 8:30. We waited in line for maybe five minutes, voted, and came home. I did not vote for Donald Trump. I did not vote for Hillary Clinton. I knew that whatever happened the presidential election results were not going to fill me with hope for the future of this nation. But that’s O.K. My hope and my encouragement come from another source, not from the political system or the elected officials in our government.

After voting on Tuesday, I wrote a letter to my son. I told him that even though I believed she was corrupt and untrustworthy, and even though her views on abortion, religious liberty, human sexuality, marriage and many other vital subjects, were anathema to me, it looked as if Hillary Clinton would become the first female president of the United States. And, I told him in my less than prescient letter, that we would survive. (Well, the survival part was good, anyway.) Not that it didn’t matter who won the election. Certainly it mattered to many babies as yet unborn, to women who would be coerced and tricked into disposing of their own children, to children who would be told that their gender and their sexuality were both inborn and unchangeable and at the same time malleable according to their own feelings. If Hillary Clinton had been elected, girls would be told that they could become anything they wanted, including becoming POTUS (good!), but also including becoming boys (impossible!). If Hillary Clinton had been elected, we would be approving of one set of laws for the poor and the middle class and another set for the rich and powerful.

On the other hand, I had already looked very carefully at what it would mean for the United States and for me and my family if Donald Trump were elected president, especially if he were elected with a majority of the votes of evangelical Christians. I am an evangelical Christian. Although I am tired of the media and the pollsters dividing Americans into tribes and ethnic groups and religious groups and socioeconomic groups, if I have a tribe, that’s mine. I am a person who claims the name of Christian. I follow Jesus. And I was and am deeply troubled by the thought that the majority of “my tribe” is following, or at least acquiesced to, Donald Trump, a man who personifies many of the things that I most hate: misogyny, disregard for the power and meaning of words, and hubris. I am told that over 80% of evangelical Christians voted for Donald Trump. That makes me sad, and I am concerned that Christians, whether we want to be or not, will be tied in the public mind to the policies and mistakes and tragedies of the Trump presidency. I am concerned that the name of Jesus will be misunderstood and vilified. I am also concerned for families of immigrants, legal and illegal, for minorities, for survivors of abuse, and for many others who are fearful and worried about living in a country where Mr. Trump is president.

Some Clinton supporters yesterday and today were posting a list of liberal organizations and causes in need of contributions from those who oppose Donald Trump and all he stands for. They wanted to give people who were grieving and angry at Mr. Trump’s election something positive to do for this country and its people. I can’t contribute to most of those causes because they are pro-abortion organizations that promote the very objectivization of women that they accuse Donald Trump of supporting. Male and female babies in the womb deserve our care and protection; girls and women outside the womb deserve our care and protection. Neither Hillary Clinton nor Donald Trump could be trusted to care about women (or men) at every stage of life. That’s why this election was so hard. That’s the elephant in the room. If the media wants to divide us into warring groups, I believe the factor most predictive of a vote for either Trump or Clinton was whether the voter was pro-life or pro-choice.

But I don’t want us to be at war with ourselves. We already fought one civil war, and although the result of that war was the great good of ending slavery, it also left us with great wounds and bitterness as a people, some of which still remain to this day. I don’t know how to resolve this deep divide, but I think we’re going to have to start by communicating with one another. We’re going to have to talk to one another about hard stuff—racism, abortion, sexuality, moral standards, what it means to be male and female—without name-calling and without violence and without silencing each other. Free speech along with “free listening” beget understanding and maybe even real tolerance.

In that previously mentioned letter, I told my son that after Hillary Clinton became president, the real work of making America great would be left up to us, the American people. In particular, Christians are called to be salt and light in a tasteless and dark world. What I told my son about the work we would be called to after Ms. Clinton was elected is just as true now that Mr. Trump is preparing to become our 45th president. We must do the work of healing relationships, building community, listening to one another, and making not just America, but the world, great and safe and forgiving and kind and freely yielded to the Lordship of Jesus Christ.

Specifically, I hope to be doing the following things to heal and make our country great:

1. I will be praying for President-elect Donald Trump as I have prayed for President Obama. I will also pray for the many other political leaders in our country and around the world, that they will restrain evil, eschew pride, and use their power wisely and carefully for the good of others.

2. I will ask people who voted for Donald Trump and people who voted for Hillary Clinton to explain to me WHY they voted as they did. I will ask them what they hope for and what they fear. I will try to listen and understand, and when I do not agree, I will still respect and show love to the person I disagree with.

3. I will celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas with my family and with my church family, and I will try to find ways to make those holidays meaningful and encouraging for all of those people who are my immediate encouragers and responsibility.

4. I will continue to contribute, not to pro-abortion causes or to political causes, but to small groups that are doing large things to make this world better: an orphanage in Zambia, a ministry to women who are trapped in the sex trade in Waco, missionaries in Nepal, a counseling ministry that will be working mostly with refugees and immigrants in Ohio. Choose your own places to give; give lots of money or just a little , as you can, or give your time to volunteer. But generous giving is one way to change the world.

5. I will carefully post encouraging and insightful words on Twitter and on Facebook and on this blog. I will think before I write and pray before I post.

6. I will smile and greet people I see at the grocery store or the post office or other places, especially people who are of another ethnic group or religious group or who just look as if they need the boost of a smile and the reassurance of a friendly greeting. I plan to go the extra mile to show that there are many, many Americans, Democrats and Republicans, who are not hateful, not racist, not misogynistic, and not intolerant.

7. I will share the gospel–in letters, in phone calls, in person, with words and with deeds. I truly believe that the good news of peace with God through Jesus Christ is the only thing that can bring peace between people. If you don’t believe that or don’t understand it, let’s talk about it. Tell me why you don’t believe in Jesus, and I will tell why I do. Maybe it’s true that America will only be great again when individual Americans come to repentance and understanding in Him.

You may or may not agree with everything I have written in this blog post. That’s OK. We are different people, and we have different ways of seeing the world. Right now I want to know: what specific things are you doing in the next few weeks or months to make things better, to truly make America great, to bring healing to our nation?